New Home

We've been working on a new website for CHALK and finally I have worked out how to add my blog posts to it - http://www.chalkconcepts.com.au/chalk_concepts_for_kids/

Now I have to decide if I should ditch the original blog or try to import it into the new one! All so hard and after using Blogger I'm finding Typepad much harder to use. What do you think?

And we're baaaaaaaack (with an a-load of pics)

First of all, thanks to all of you for your kind thoughts and words. You've all been so nice, and it means a lot to me to know that you care! Secondly, I'm coping fine. I am sad, but functioning. I'm about ready to strangle my oldest child, but I think I might just drug him instead. Ha ha, just kidding. Sort of. He is driving me steadily insane, that much is true.

So, I'm gonna talk about something fun. I'm going to tell you all about the big Cake show we went to last Wednesday night. WOOOO! Holla! Ok, let me preface this by saying that we had a fan-fucking-tastic time... from what I remember. In the hotel room we drank at least two bottles of wine, maybe three (?).

EXHIBIT A:

Me gettin' dolled up.

Mala is totally checking out my rack.

Oh, how we laughed! La la laaaaa!

A three-pack of hotties (this was before Jill arrived).

Hot MILF action!!! AKA: Is that a camera in my pocket or am I just glad to see ya?
Then had two more of the crappiest screw-top bottles of wine EVER, with dinner. That's when things start getting fuzzy for The Bev.

EXHIBIT B:

GULP

I love you, maaaaaaan!

Let me clarify... I love you as a friend, maaaaan!

Celebrity mis-sighting of the night: Laurie kept staring at this dude who was eating behind us, saying he looked like the guy from Grounded for Life. Me, being the encyclopedia of worthless knowledge, pulled that dude's name from my ass with a dexterity that amazed even myself. Donal Logue! Of course! Doesn't everyone know his name? Heh. So, Faux-Donal came and had his picture taken with us, much to the chagrin of his seething Asian wife. WHOOPSIE. Piss-off of the night #1 (that we know of).


Apres din-din... looking a little sassier.
I have vague recollections of the show, and I remember getting super excited when a couple of my favorite songs came on (The Distance, Never There, Stick Shifts & Safety Belts, Short Skirt, Long Jacket, Frank Sinatra), but don't remember actually paying attention to the songs or ya know, listening. (BLUSH)




I do remember that I couldn't figure out how to work my gd camera, so I have a ton of 3 second video clips that were supposed to be pictures. *sigh* I maintain that it was wicked dahhhk in there, but... well, we all know it was alcohol-induced user error. The few video clips I did get are shakey as hell and pretty much un-watchable, and some feature Laurie singing LOUDLY right next to me, and me intoning, "Laaaaaaurrriiiiieeee" now and then. HA! Thankfully for us, but not for those around us, Laurie was snapping pics like nobody's business. Srsly, we got yelled at a few times. Piss Off of the night #2. In retrospect, I'm a little embarrassed... but whatever. We had fun. Those othah suckahs can... well, suck it!



I remember spending a fair amount of time texting another friend, and at intermission I went out to make a call and then things get really fuzzzzzzy. I remember Jill waited in line for a beer, and I somehow convinced her to give it to me. Why? I don't know. Not like I needed that shit! Then, I'm TOLD I went back to my seat, but next thing I remember is wandering around outside in the lobby with no clue where my friends went. Turns out they'd gone down to the stage and Laurie was working her magic on a security guard, trying to get us backstage. HAHAHAHAHA! Mala says Laurie was stroking his face and going all out. All I know is when I checked my texts the next day there were like 10 back and forths between me and Mala, all of them like this:

Me: where aaaaaah you guys?
Mala: near the stage. come down!
Me: wait? what?
Mala: we might get backstage. Come NOW!
Me: Who are you with? What?
Mala: Get your ASS DOWN HERE NOW!
Me: I LOVE THIS SONG!
Mala: BEVERONI, COME HERE NOW!
Me: (crickets)

They did not get backstage. Eventually I found my way back in and Mala found me standing against the back wall, staring at the band with a bemused expression on my face. Doo-dee-dooo... Bev's in LA LA LAND. Pandemonium continued, the band ended the show, and next thing I remember Mala and I were sitting under a street lamp waiting for Jill and Laurie. Don't know how long we sat there, or what we discussed (well, ok, I remember some of that, but that shit's private, yo!), but we did eventually get back to the hotel and reunited with our friends.



Cut to later: Laurie decides she needs pizza and goes to the lobby for some reason. And she runs into the band, who are also staying at the hotel. And she somehow gets the guitar player's freaking room phone number?! WTF? Conclusion: Laurie is magic. So she called him, I think, but things were all blurry and shit by then, so I don't think it went anywhere beyond a 5 min. convo. But, still. Gotta hand it to Laurie - when she gets it in her mind to do something, that shit gets D-O-N-E.

We went to sleep around 1ish, and I got the call at 5:15 AM that my dad was having a massive heart attack. This event will forever be known going forward as, "THE WORLD'S BIGGEST MOFO BUZZKILL." So, there's that.

BUT, the night was amazing. My friends crack me up and party like rockstars, and I'm so grateful to them for supporting me, laughing with me, and getting shitfuck wasted with me every now and then.

Finally The Crafting Bug Has Bitten

While Surfer Boy is out in the shed making me some frames for my new potato garden I thought I'd show you what else I've been up to.

I had been putting off a visit to Spotlight all week as I had to buy some filling for a quilt order and I just wasn't motivated. When I finally made myself go I fell in lust with some fabric and decided my project to redo the cushions on my couch should begin now. I spent the rest of the afternoon throwing out my old covers and making 6 new ones.

.

I'm pretty happy with the result and more than happy with the $29.00 it cost me. Even Surfer Boy likes them and he usually isn't a fan of couch cushions.

The only problem now is that the cat seems to have taken a major shine to them and is hard to oust from the couch.

It happened.

I apologize; I won't be posting about the Cake show as I had planned. That'll have to wait till another day.

My father died this morning. He had a massive heart attack and decided not to go to any great extremes to live; he didn't want to be an invalid, and let's face it, he had terminal cancer, so, that's that. They gave him morphine for the pain and he passed away holding my mom's hand.

I'm numb and teary, but coping. We had a month to get used to the idea that he was dying, and most people don't even get that. I had a couple more wonderful days with him. There was nothing left unsaid. He is not in pain anymore, and he is not afraid of the torture of cancer treatment anymore, and now he is everywhere, just in a different form.

I am grieving over the fact that I can't see him anymore, and can't ask his advice or listen to his voice anymore. I miss him already. My heart is broken, but I will heal. He taught me how.


I love you, Daddy, and I always will.

The Mum Song

One of the Mums at school just sent this to me and I thought I'd share it. How many of these lines have you used on your kids?

As promised

I hope I didn't over-hype the tom-foolery, but here 'tis:



Bitches be all up on my behind, yo!

Hrmmm, I really need to clean up my image. You're all gonna think I'm some kind of wild girl who lets her friends grope her when she gets dru... ah, screw it. Even girls can't resist ALL THIS. Yeah. Uh huh.

HEE! Anyway. Here's another cute pic, while I'm at it. Totally forgot to post it last night due to a lingering buzz that reduced my typing to hunting & pecking Franken-fingers.

My kid's the one on the end with chocolate all over his face and a blissed out expression. I am awesome at parenting, clearly. As Laurie put it, the little guy went all "Lord of the Flies" by the end of the party. 'Cause that's how we do it, baby.

Tomorrow night's the big Cake show, and I promise to take lots of pics as usual, and to bore you with them on Thursday. This is my vow to you, loyal readers, and I take this kind of thing very seriously. *hiccup* Scout's honor.

I got yer Memorial Day right here!

AKA: I have a splitting headache and am in a grumpy mood. Boo.

Yesterday we went to a BBQ at my friend Sarah's house and had a great time. All of my girlfriends noticed that I've lost weight and told me how hot I am, so that made my day. They lie, but whatev; it's still nice to hear. Of course, that meant they all kept grabbing my ass all day, 'cause as I've mentioned, my friends are pervy like me, but that didn't bother me. I have a really funny pic to share with you, but it'll have to wait since I forgot to upload it and it's on my home computer. That is just how my day is going today!

Moving backwards, on Saturday we went to Vermont yet again. We picked up my dad at the hospital and brought him home, and on the way we stopped by my childhood homestead and I took a couple of pics. This is where I lived from the age of 4 till I was 12:

It breaks my heart -- the place is for sale now and nobody's taking care of it. It's going super cheap now, I think they've lowered the price to the low $300k area, which is nothing considering what an amazing home it is. It was built in 1832 as an inn/stagecoach stop. It has twelve (!) bedrooms, eight fireplaces, and a full unfinished attic. Also, there are two apartments, a garage, and it's on 4 acres, with the Connecticut River within walking distance from the back door. I just love everything about it, and would love to buy it... but I am not moving back to northern VT, yo. Forget it! Couldn't pay me enough. So, I just sigh and gaze at it sadly every time I see it.


My mom planted that Willow tree - it was just a little stalk for so long, and look at it now!


That's all I got. I'll post that pic I told you about later on -- it's a funny one! And I am mulling over taking Steph's suggestion and doing a vlog this week, but no promises. I might even try to convince Mala to get in on that action while we're doin' it up at the Cake show this Wednesday. So, you'd get a two-fer if she says yes! Woohoo!! Ok, mostly, I just have to prove to you naysayers that we don't sound like Bahston-ites. NTTAWWT!

I will leave you with a few random pics from yesterday. Enjoy.
My studly hubby:

Laurie's studly hubby:

Sarah, me, Laurie, and my finger:

LATAH!

Timbaaaaaaa

I was going to show you my mulching - very boring - but I realised this was much more interesting. I have the kind of husband who actually does stuff as soon as I've asked. I happened to mention that nothing would grow in one of the beds because the tree was blocking the sun so five minutes later he had the chainsaw out and half the tree was down!! I'm sure he thinks I don't appreciate him but one day, if he ever reads this blog, he'll see that I do - very much.

Now to abuse his kindness and think of some more things I want done...

Glorious

Autumn is not the time of year when I usually feel inspired to hit the garden but this year the weather has been so perfect for gardening in Melbourne that I can't help myself. I even bought myself some gumboots today! Now that the veggie garden is nearly done I'm moving on to the next bed.

.

Enjoying a Given Day

So, yesterday I spent the day in VT with my Dad, and it rocked. We laughed, we cried, it was better than Cats. I mean it, I saw Cats on Broadway and yesterday was totally better, and included less make-up and more ballads under the spotlight. What? That's just how we hang in my fam. So?

I got there about 20 minutes late because I inexplicably drove towards the wrong highway and found myself in bleeping Concord for no good reason. Mala, I think I really just wanted to hang with you, so my car steered itself in your direction. Bear in mind that there are only TWO highways heading north, and I drove 10 minutes out of my way to get on the wrong one. FML.

When I got there, I was fully ready to get my Farm Girl on. My parents have a couple of horses and make their own hay, and they used to be dairy farmers before I was born. Plus, it's Vermont, yo, so it's all rural and shit. I grew up there, but was never all that "into" it. My dad loves to tell people that I'm the farmer's daughter who once asked him if butter was a dairy product. Yeah, I rule! Anyway, I get there, and the blacksmiths are already working on the horses' hooves, and I'm cursing myself out for my little detour because I had meant to get there before they arrived. My whole purpose today was to help out Dad, because he had some fonked-up shit done to his brain yesterday in the form of a medieval torture device/screws in his skull/gamma knife thing. Yeah, no shit.

I go out to the ring and Dad's standing there with two total V-Monty characters, a man and a woman. She's all tough as shit and is filing down our big Quarterhorse's dinner plate-sized hoof, and I find out her name is Sloane, which does two things to me: 1. makes me wish I had a cool name like that, and 2. think of Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Meanwhile, Dad is standing there all casual-like, but he looks like Dr. Frankenstein just removed his bolts and he's wearing a little Tractor Supply hat perched on top of his humongous bandage/turban. HEE!!! I know it's wrong to laugh, but come ON! He looked really, really bizarre. Also, he looked like he'd been in a bar fight because his eyes were practically swollen shut. Wicked cool.

They're all talking, and the smithies ask Dad who his vet is. Dad can't remember (can't blame him - again, BRAIN work), so they start tossing out truck colors. As in, this vet drives a blue truck, that vet drives a red one. I'm barely containing my giggles at this point. I mean, for real? We can identify people by their trucks 'round these parts? Jebus. After a while, Dad sends me down to the lower pasture to wait for some chick who's supposed to buy some hay. I'm like, great, I get to load hay today. Suh-weeeet. So I go down there and sit in my car, and the whore never shows, but it turned out to be my MOMENT OF ZEN for the day:


The birds are singing. There is a babbling brook to my right. There's a farmer working a field just over yonder. I'm feeling VERY peaceful and very much at one with nature and the universe and all that nice stuff, and all is right with the world.... Good stuff. Side note: one thing that I love about Vermont is that everyone waves at each other when they pass in their cars. Everyone. It's so goddamn friendly, I can't stand it.

Later on, I helped Dad put in his air conditioners, and darn it if that guy wasn't swingin' a hammer and handling a drill like he hadn't spent yesterday in a hospital with metal screws holding a steel cage on his skull. He is amazing. We went out to lunch, and he even drove. There's something about bumping along in his big ol' Caddy (yeah, Dad always drives a Cadillac, always has, always will), talking to him like nothing is wrong, that puts the happy back into my soul. We've always had very deep philosophical discussions, and some of our best talks have been in the car. In Vermont, it takes a while to get just about anywhere, so we spend a lot of time driving along, shooting the shit, laughing, and talking about life.

After lunch we went grocery shopping and I chuckled at what a little old man he has become. I also realize that I'm totally not as frugal as I pride myself on being; if I want something and it's not on sale, I buy that fucker anyway. Dad? No way! However, he bought my mom a dozen roses... just because. *sigh*

On the way home we took a detour and he showed me his friend's dairy farm. He spends a lot of time there, helping out, because he just enjoys that type of work. First of all, I have to say that I have seen the Rocky Mtns (magnificent), and I have seen the Swiss Alps (stunning), but there is just something about the gently rolling green hills and valleys of the Northeast Kingdom that inspires awe in me like no other place. Maybe because it's home.

The dairy farm was cool. I don't think I've set foot in a working barn in about 20 years, to be honest, and it was nice to see it all again, even if it does totally gross me out on many levels. And, I don't like that I got cow poop on my favorite sneaks, but I can deal with that. It was cool, and I love a good slice of life. Also, I'm a sucker for accents, and I totally DIG the Vermont accent. It's not like southern NH (which is sort of like Bahston, but not quite), and it's certainly not like Maine, which is just totally effed up. It's just this way of speaking that makes 1 syllable words into 3 syllable masterpieces of sound, and it is so down-home and so comfortable; well, I just dig it. Example: the word "cow," is pronounced, by the thick-accented natives, as "key-ow-a." Rock the fuck on! Dad gets a kick out of "harrow," which they pronounce, "herw." FYI - we don't really have accents; we're from New York/New Jersey originally.

Ok, I'm babbling. Suffice to say that it was a lovely day, and having a chance to spend time 1:1 with my father is something I'd never trade for anything. He is one of my favorite people on the planet, and he always will be.

Next Step

Moondoggie has the day off on Tusedays so after our usual breakfast at The Corner Shop in Yarraville Village we headed off to Poyntons Nursery in Essendon.

It is always a treat to visit Poyntons but especially with a project in mind.

I closed my eyes to all the other treats on offer and headed to the veggie section. As planned we chose broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, chives, strawberries and some herbs. I also grabbed a passionfruit for the fence and some sweetpeas to add some height to the bed.

As is always the case a few extras some how ended up on our trolley and by the time we got home we had a blueberry bush, 2 salvias and some catnip for Oscar. Because I am hopeless I also snuck in some hollyhocks and Canterbury bells that I just could not resist. 2 bales of mulch, seeded potatoes and we were on our way.

Phew! It wasn't until I wrote it down that I realised how much I'd bought.

We spent the afternoon planting and this is the result...

The Herb box.

Blueberries and Catnip!

Next step - mulching!

I Wish

Do you like my new header photo? I kind of like logging on just to have a look at it. Do you think anyone believes it is my actual garden? Maybe international readers who don't know that inner city Melbourne doesn't have thatched cottages! What I wouldn't do for a garden like this. I can appreciate a modern, water concious, minimalist or native garden but I am a complete romantic sucker for a cottage garden. I know it's cliche'd as far as gardens go but I just can't help myself. There is something Green Gables, with a touch of fairy about a cottage garden.

Here are some more shots of the same cottage...

Alliteration be damned!

I know it's not Thankful Thursday, but I'm feeling thankful today, so suck it. :) I say that in the nicest way possible, like when I jokingly tell someone to "shut the fuck up." I hate it when they think I'm being serious. Especially my boss. Kidding, kidding! I never say it loudly enough for him to hear me.

Anyway!

I would like to send out a big THANK YOU to the nice man who flashed his lights at me this morning so I would know to slow down because there was a cop behind him. YAY, for random acts of kindness! You see, my street is hilly and windy and the speed limit is 30 MPH, which is pretty near impossible to maintain without riding the brake the whole time. 40 MPH is pretty comfortable, and that's just coasting! So, I've been pulled over twice since we've lived at this house (almost 8 years, so it's not like I'm a total speed demon), and one time I got the mutha of all speeding tickets for going about 52 mph. Ooops. Whatever, I had a pizza in the car and I was hungry, Occifer, so screw off. Ok, I didn't say that to him, but I definitely thought it.

I even have a stupid radar detector now, thanks to my FIL who loooooves gadgets. It has saved my ass a few times, I'll admit it. The last time I got pulled over it was about a week after I got that ticket, and the cop let me off... I'm pretty sure because I was wearing a low-cut top and I cried a little. STFU, I'm not too proud. Tickets suck!

Getting pulled over this morning would have totally ruined my day, so I just want to throw the THANKS out into the universe and I hope that the guy in the red jeep has a fantastic day and maybe even gets laid or something. GO, DUDE! You've earned it.

What else? I'm also thankful because I'm back into my "skinny jeans," but don't get too impressed because those still aren't tiny; it's not like I'm gushing over being a size 6. HA, no. But, when I got on the scale for my daily slap in the face (yes, I do it daily, don't judge... if I don't I find myself struggling to button my pants by the end of the week, for reals), I was hoping to see 1_9, but instead I saw 1_4. That middle digit is private, so don't be nosey. :) In fact, I was so convinced that my scale had broken that I made my kid get on it, too, and it was actually accurate. Huh. So, today is a good day, and all of my pants are too big, and I'll fucking TAKE IT. Thank you.

In closing, I will leave you with one of my favorite sketches from the now-defunct Canadian comedy troupe, The Kids In The Hall. It's amazing, they've been gone for over a decade, but I still find myself quoting them all. the. time. From this clip, I have been known to throw out my favorite line, "You just blew my mind!" and Jim will respond with, "Our minds have been blown!"


"He's really light, too!"

Sustainable Living in Kingsville

Moondoggie and I have started a new project. We decided to make a veggie garden and with the help of a certain Surfer Boy who happens to be good with a hammer, it is starting to come along nicely.


Our back garden has always been a bit of a dog's breakfast due to the fact that 8 years ago we thought we would be renovating soon so didn't want to waste money on an area that would eventually be flattened! We've whacked in some garden beds, pulled up all the concrete and grown some grass but in general it leaves a lot to be desired. The advantage is you can clear a whole bed without losing anything of value and start again with a - veggie garden.

I'm very proud of us - usually I just want to put everything in so it looks pretty but this time we're actually preparing the soil first. A sprinkle of dynamic lifter followed a few days later by manure and a couple of handfuls of lime.

Surfer Boy edged it properly for us and he's promised to fix the window box on the cubby so we can plant herbs there.

Moondoggie and I have decided to only plant things that we like to eat so we have chosen carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, and maybe some strawberries (yes we know they're not veggies but gee they're yummy) We might try and grow potatoes too but I think some research needs to be done there first.

I'll keep you posted on our progress.

In Awe

I took Gidget to visit her godmother yesterday at the Park Hyatt. Gidget loved seeing Kris and her family but she was even more excited about the actual hotel! I had forgotten how exciting a luxury hotel is when you're small. The glitz, the glamour, the lifts, the piano man! She was in awe. I think afternoon tea visits to Melbourne's hotels might be a great idea.

I, on the other hand, was in awe of Gidget's godmother!

Kris gave birth to her beautiful daughter on Thursday, and you would swear she didn't raise a sweat. She radiates calm and is happily holding court at the Hyatt with her usual grace and charm. Even the arrival of her three boys did nothing to outwardly disturb the tranquility although she did mention that she wouldn't be encouraging them to stay too long!

I find it amazing and comforting to know that after 26 years Kris and I are still there for the big moments in each other's lives.

Congratulations Will and Kris - she is divine.

Kris and Jen - 1985

Goodbye

Warning: This post may be a downer for some. Skip it if you want; I won't be offended.



My last living grandparent passed away today at the age of 93. Here I am at my college graduation with my two grandmothers. Grandma S. (above right) died two years ago, after living with dementia for the past five years or so. She lived independently well into her late 80's, and I loved that woman silly. Grandma C. (above left)) was as mean as a wet cat and maintained her faculties until about six months ago, when she went crazy like someone switched an "off" switch in her brain. Maybe someone did. She never recovered her senses. She'd been ill for a long time; bedridden, blind, bad heart, diabetes... you name it, but she was always a razor sharp lady, right up until recently.

In short, we've been expecting her to die for a long time, and nobody was particularly sad because she was old and ill and wanted to die. She was mean to just about everyone in her life, but she was always nice to me and my sister. I don't know why, maybe it's because we lived 8 hours away from her and only saw her a couple of times a year. At any rate, we got off easy. Plus, she liked me a lot because I was into theatre, and that was her thing in college and later with my grandfather in community theatre.

She lived to be 93 years old; she saw my whole childhood, my Jr. High, High School and college graduations, my bridal shower, my wedding, my children born. That's a pretty good fucking run, I'd say. Ninety-three is a good long life.

Seventy is not long enough.

Since I've been listening to a lot of Cake recently, this song has been speaking to me:

"End Of The Movie"

People you love
Will turn their backs on you
You'll lose your hair
Your teeth
Your knife will fall out of its sheath
But you still don't like to leave before the end of the movie
People you hate will get their hooks into you
They'll pull you down
You'll frown
They'll tar you and drag you through town
But you still don't like to leave before the end of the movie
No you still don't like to leave before the end of the show


Sure, life sucks sometimes, and bad shit happens, but you still don't want to die before your story is done. Right on.

I'm so sad that my children won't have a picture like this that includes my dad. I'm so sad that my dad is being ushered out of the movie when it's clearly not finished yet. I'm so sad, and I'm getting really pissed off.

Rest in peace, Grandma. This quote's for you:

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts

From As You Like It, by Wm. Shakespeare. Incidentally, that was the very first production I was ever a part of, at the tender age of 14, and I didn't have any lines at all.

Just because I can.

Friday night blogging action, yo! I'm kickin' it at home, drinking a lovely glass of cab, reading a chapter or two of my book, and scoping out the gossip sites I somehow managed to fall behind on during the work week. Happy Gilmore is on, which isn't one of my favorites, but I won't kick it out of bed, either. So I'm on Perez Hilton and what do I find? Only the best piece of media I've seen all week!

A few of my favorite things, all wrapped into one 4 minute clip.... Weezer covering MGMT's "Kids," (love that song, don't know why... just do) AND busting out some mad GaGa halfway through for no good reason!

Fuckin' A, man! Yes, and yes. Oh, and HELL yes. Bring. It.


DAMN, I wish I'd been at that show. Weezer freakin' rocks. They're good musicians, they're funny & quirky, they are self-deprecating, they appreciate all musical genres, and they totally rock it out in concert. And that's not just the glass of wine talkin'.

PS) I would also like to thank whomever shot this little ditty for our viewing pleasure. Next time you all make fun of me for being the "stalkerazzi" at shows, just remember that without us camera-wielding dingbats, YouTube would not exist.

So suck it.



Goodnight, sleep tight, and get lucky.
That is all.

Oops

Looks like I might've dumped the whole contents of my brain yesterday, so now I've got nuthin' for today. I shot my wad, if you will. So I'm going to be uber-lazy and throw up this little gem that Harmony sent me today. Btw, doesn't Harmony rock the hizzouse? I can see you all nodding your little heads and saying, "Why yes, Bev, she certainly does rock the hizzouse."

Good readers. **pat**pat**

Without further ado, I give you the Robin Sparkles hit "Let's go to the Mall:"


It's no "Sandcastles in the Sand," but it'll do, and brain hurts when try think good today. Wait, what? Did I just have a tiny stroke? Eh, whatever. Have a good night, everyone. Tomorrow is another day!

Brain dump

I am feeling very goofy and very random today, which will either mean that this post will end up funny or bizarre or a little bit of both. I'm just gonna download the contents of my brain for you to make fun of, 'cause that's how I roll. Speaking of that - I'm so over that expression, but I can't seem to drop it and I can't seem to replace it yet. Highly annoying.

Ok, in no particular order, here are today's random musings:
(that one was for my friend MOFM... b/c I know she just loves that word!)

I've lost 10 lbs since I found out my dad has cancer. Woo-hooo...? Turns out it was easy to do; all you have to do is stop eating. Who fucking knew? Not me! 6 small meals a day? Eff that! All I did was give up a few luxuries like breakfast, snacks, and desserts, and what do you know? Sure, I'm hungry all the damn time, but I've kind of gotten used to it. Even more strange? I kind of like it. I wonder if this is how skinny people feel?

Yes, I know my metabolism will crash and burn eventually, so save your comments! I will resume my usual feeding schedule at some point when food becomes more appealing again. Except for snacks and desserts, because apparently once you hit your mid-30's you just can't have those every day. Again, who knew? I never get too skinny; for one thing, I'm just not put together that way. I'm built for comfort, not speed, baby! For another, my man likes my curves and might not be as "warm for my form" if I lost 'em all.

Funny thing about that. Jim's family is very weight-conscious, which is just a trifle annoying when you're, ya know, making babies and watching the scale go up, down and all around every couple of years in order to do so. His mom is one of these very pretty, very skinny, very popular girls. I actually love her, and how often do you hear someone say they love their MIL? Anyway, she's always dieting & only eats like once a day. His dad is always onto some new fad diet or exercise program (currently it's yoga... so he's always pulling out downward-freaking-dog in the weirdest places... it's all kinds of wrong). Anyway, he struggles with his weight quite a bit, but is the first one to notice if you put some on or take some off. Jim and his brothers are all very tall and well-built guys, and maintaining their weight isn't an issue for any of them, the bastards. What's intesting is that all three brothers picked girls who are not super-skinny stick figures. Not that we're fat, but we all definitely have curves. Actually, I think the common theme among us is big boobs, now that I think about it.

Next subject! The new Sookie Stackhouse novel is just ok. I'm not lovin' it. I haven't had much time to read lately, so maybe I'm just in a funk? But so far, it's a little dull, and there isn't nearly enough sex. Boo.

What else? Hmmmm.

I didn't make plans for this weekend, which is a little unusual. I really need to get my house under control. Working and being away so much lately have really taken a toll on my already sucky housekeeping skillz. We have 4 ft. clean laundry piles in the bedroom. At least it's clean, but rooting around up to my elbows looking for matching socks every morning is really getting OLD. I always keep the kitchen and living areas clean, because, I mean - I'm not a total pig, but the upstairs is a wreck. So, that's my plan for the weekend. Try not to be too jealous of my exciting life, ok?

Lastly, I'll leave you with a little video that's been on my mind a lot lately. I remember when it first came out, I was driving in my car and I was so taken by the words that I had to immediately rush home to try to find it online. It just strikes a chord with me, because it's pretty much exactly how I feel about aging, and you all know how much a pasty chick like me needs sunscreen. :)


And that's that. Oh, one last thing. Does anyone ever catch the Ellen Degeneres show? It's on here at the office, and I mostly tune it out, but there's this one segment that KILLS me every time they do it. They give random people in the audience microphones and put on a popular song, then they play it back with just one person's mic on so all you hear is them warbling along, not knowing all the words and stuff. I just about cry with laughter every time I see it. I'd find an example of it online for you, but I'm too effing hungry, so you'll just have to take my word on it that it's hysterical. Latah!

Love a Good Quiz

Over at Stars Hollow K. posted this fantastic quiz. She was a 'Christopher' and look who I am - 'Luke'. I think the fact that I find a toolbelt very sexy might have been the clincher. Who is your perfect Gilmore Girls man?

Citrusey Love

I haven't done much house related stuff lately but this shot courtesy of Serena and Lily is lovely. I think it is the soothing colour palette that I love. Might have to go and hunt up some more inspirational interiors....