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Thursday, September 9, 2010

Stats Gone Wild

Greetings and salutations! I thought it might be fun to do another post about the fun stuff Google Analytics digs up for me every month.  I don't check the stats all that often, but when I do I'm continually amused by some of the search terms that bring people here to the OOBH.  I also love looking at the maps and seeing how many people came from each state, country, etc.

Don't worry, stalkers, I can't tell who specifically visits from which state; it doesn't give me your name or anything.  However I know where some of you live (muahaha!) so I do find myself saying, for example, "Aw, Frank Irwin is one of my most devoted BOOBHs.  I just love that guy for always supporting me!"  :)   Conversely, that means I also say, "Huh, why doesn't so-and-so come visit much anymore?  Hope I haven't offended or worse, bored them!"  Because yes, I am annoyingly sensitive; probably too sensitive for this whole blogging endeavor, but fuck it.  I like doing it despite sometimes getting my feelings hurt.

So let's get on wid it!

Last month the OOBH saw a visitor from every state in the U.S. except for these four:



Wyoming - again.  WTF, Wyoming?








Iowa - Call me corny, (yuk, yuk) but it bummed me out that I had no visitors from Iowa.  I mean, what else is there to do there?  Come read my damn blog, will ya?







Maine - way to keep it New England, ya' mooseknuckles!







Rhode Island - Is neither a Rhode nor an Island.  Discuss.






We also had visitors from 24 different countries, including Sweden.  Sven, is that you?  (Hey, a girl can dream can't she?)

A big I LOVE YOU, MAN goes out to the great state of California - the #1 visiting state.  I knew I loved you, Cali!


My home state of New Hampster was numero dos.

And now on to the truly fun & disturbing part... the keyword searches!  90% of the keywords that bring people to the OOBH are simply, "outofbevshead," "oobh," or "bev's head."  It's the other 10% that provide endless insight into the scary people who use Google every day.  Here are some favorites:

fox hole strip club (so many hits for this... so. many.)
panty theft (hey, it happens)
embarrassing lactation stories (I haz them)
belly button removed (who needs 'em?)
my boobs into his head (indeed)
wacky water writer (at your service!)
why is it so hard to be Christian (He's Batman?)
alexander skarsgard sweden (yes, please!)
bad chatroulette moments (if you think masturbation is bad, then yes)
bagpipes I'll stand by you (okay)
bev flipping out jenni (yeah, fuck you, Jenni!)
bevtini (maybe just one)
boobs getting out of hand (they do that)
boobs bigger than my head (depends on whose head)
chatroulette penis (goes together like a horse & carriage)
eau d' twat boy and his mother and his sister (huh?)
emodisis (no, emo DAT is)
how to stew sour apples (beats me, but I'm all over stewing sour grapes)
jm panty sniffing (JM, that's disgusting!)
knullruff (aw, Sven!)
lactation muffins (sound delightful)
lactating boobs clothespin (OUCH!)
list of facebook pet peeves (Yes, I've got one!)
long duk dong can't be a doctor (I beg to differ)
mature ass munchers (let's not drag Larry King into this, ok?)
Mike129 Twitter (Oh, Mike129... someone is looooooooking for youuuuuuu!)
mil in real panties (instead of imaginary ones?)
plumpies in panties (I got nothin'.)
sour apple makes cats not pee (good to know. I guess.)
where should bev's breasts be (Ummmm)
your milk squirting stories are hilarious (Thanks!)

Ah, Google Stats - always entertaining!  Thanks to all of you who visit the OOBH, whatever your reasons.  I love you all, even the folks who stumbled across me while searching for pictures of lactating MILFs.  You rock!