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Monday, February 8, 2010

I'll be Maverick; you can be Goose.

Hi all! Good weekend?

Mine was okay, but nothing to write home (or blog) about. Yet, here I sit wanting to write something despite my glaring lack of good material. Now I know what it must be like to be a writer on SNL!

On Saturday morning I took my kids on a cub scout outing to the NH Air National Guard in Concord. The guardsmen were very accomodating and even let the kids climb all over one of their helicopters for quite a while, then landed a copter and gave a little show of what it could do outside while we watched inside. Very cool!

The only buzzkill was my oldest son, who woke up that morning with a bug up his arse and the word, "No" punctuating every sentence he uttered. I swear to dog, if I didn't love him so much I would have left him with the guardsmen until he was old enough to enlist. He started his Asshole Tour of Duty (AToD) by taking the pilot's seat and refusing to give it up to other kids for turns, then we got down to brass tacks when he took off across the hanger towards a roped-off high security section and wouldn't come back.

Oh, and remember the part about how I have no voice and am also in charge of keeping my 2 year old from hurting himself while climbing around in a helicopter? Yeah, that was also happening. Did any of the other parents in our pathetic little den offer to help when they saw me struggling, voiceless, to calm a tantruming 65 lb. six year old who refused to do anything I asked, even go to the bathroom? Nope, they sure didn't. Great job, folks - it takes a village!

Rest assured that when I finally wrestled the kids back into the car and calmed down for a minute, D felt mom's wrath. He lost his new mp3 player (a hand-me-down from J), his lunch trip to McDonald's, and his afternoon playdate with my friend Jill's daughters. So THERE.

The moral of this story: Mom may not be able to git' ya when you're being bad, but you'll pay later. Oh yes, you'll pay.

You mess with the bull, you get the horns.



Yesterday was even more dull. The high point was a trip to BJ's in which I bought a bunch of stuff because I had some killer coupons, then I forgot to use said coupons at check-out because YOU KNOW WHO decided to goof around and distract me. Yes, the AToD continued as he tried to push the cart away (with his brother in it) as I struggled to pay, load the cart, and make myself heard by the annoyed cashier. That little brain fart cost me about $20. Sigh.

It was really just more proof that I shouldn't have left the house at all, and I wouldn't have if we weren't at Defcon 5 thanks to a severe diaper shortage and a case of the toddler ploppy-poos.

By the time my husband and his brother came home from their calm, delightful day of skiing, I was a wee bit frazzled. I passed off tortellini-boiling duties and retreated to my room to regroup.


I know a lot of you probably enjoyed the Super Bowl last night. I didn't watch; I don't really "do" sports. What I did find myself zoning out to for a good 20 minutes last night was this:

Puppy Bowl IV.


Good gravy, is there anything cuter than 3 month old puppies? Fuzzy puppies, fat puppies, skinny puppies, puppy tummies, puppy breath... just... PUPPIES!

Yes. I dislike sports and love puppies. SO? It's good to be a girl.

A mom? The jury's out on that one.

Here's to a better week ahead!