So, my husband is one of those "suffer in silence" types. He often hurts himself whilst out doing his manly things in the woods, and I don't know that he has hurt himself until I find bloody Band-Aids in the garbage, notice he's missing a fingernail (ew!), or see him hobbling around more than usual. Maybe that's a good thing, because hey, no one likes a whiny bitch, now does one?
Nice, Bev. Nice.
That being said, two weeks ago the dude went skiing and fell down. Hard. Again, it's not unusual (Tom Jones - shout out!) for him to hobble a bit after a particularly grueling day on the slopes. He often takes a couple of days to walk normally and can be found on the couch, nursing a beer, elevating and icing his knee. Have I mentioned he's had two ACL repairs? No? Well, yeah, there's that.
So I didn't blink when he was looking even worse than usual last week, walking a little sideways and a lot stiffly. In fact, I am so unobservant that he managed to hide his GIGANTIC SWOLLEN AND PURPLE ASS BRUISE from me for almost 5 full days. When he finally showed it to me, I could not believe it. He has shelf-ass.
His hip is swollen out at least 8", it's rock hard, and is the most vile purplish-blackish-yellowish-greenish color you've ever seen.
< This is where I'd put the picture of it if my stupid camera hadn't stupid broken, and if he hadn't threatened me with the posting of some of our more unsightly photos of me from our collection if I dared take a photo of his swollen ass bruise. >
Now, 9 days later, the blood seems to be draining from said wound down his leg and pooling into his freakishly-deformed caveman foot. It's completely revolting, and I cannot believe he didn't go see a doctor. I mean, dude, your leg is the size of a Redwood and is turning nauseating colors. What would it take to make you go see an MD?
In related news, here's a tip for ya: don't Google Image "ass bruise." Seriously, don't.
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Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Breaks, Broken, BROKE.
Stupid everything keeps stupid breaking!!!
*deep breath*
Ok, just a teensy little rant here. Do you ever just have a period of time when everything seems to break at once? Does it ever happen during a month when you're just behind everywhere and can't seem to catch your breath much less balance the dang checkbook? GAH!
On Whoopsie Wednesday, my drunk ass was nuking a plate of nachos (don't judge!) after The Hubster brought me home, when the microwave flashed brilliant white and then was silent. Never to nuke another nacho. No how.
This puts a cramp in my dinner-making style since I tend to microwave a bag o' Steam Fresh vegetables nearly every night, so since then I've had to *gasp* buy fresh vegetables and boil the damn things. That is just far too much effort for me, sadly. So, we need a new microwave.
Eight years ago, when we bought this house, the oven was on the list of "things to replace." Yeah, it's still here. It doesn't go over 400 degrees F. Well, you can set it to whatever you want, but be aware that if you set it even one itty bitty degree over 400, whatever you put in there will immediately be reduced to a charcoal briquette. Trust me. It took my husband several years of burning his frozen pizzas to take my word for it. And now, it's been getting worse; there's just no predicting when it will burn the crap out of your food. So, we need a new oven.
Last straw: I seem to go through digital cameras like they're the disposable cardboard kind. I mean, I try to treat them nicely; I keep them in a little padded camera bag and I don't let the kids play with them. Well, despite my best efforts, my beloved little Canon started acting weird a couple of weeks ago. I mean, I looked like crap in every shot, so it MUST be the camera, right? Heh. Right. Anyway, it really was taking blurry pics and it was pissing me off, so I got even with it by dropping it on my kitchen floor on Saturday while clowning around with Mala in a Merlot-induced photo sesh. So, we need a new camera.
I need to fall in a pile of cash, apparently, or else find a super duper Microwave/Range/Camera combo sale somewhere.
Farging icehole.
EDITED TO ADD:
Two more pieces of shite to add to the list: my double toaster - one side is kaput for no discernable reason. Great. More importantly and MOST ANNOYINGLY, my cell phone keeps turning off with no warning while I'm talking on it! WTF??! I give up!
*deep breath*
Ok, just a teensy little rant here. Do you ever just have a period of time when everything seems to break at once? Does it ever happen during a month when you're just behind everywhere and can't seem to catch your breath much less balance the dang checkbook? GAH!
On Whoopsie Wednesday, my drunk ass was nuking a plate of nachos (don't judge!) after The Hubster brought me home, when the microwave flashed brilliant white and then was silent. Never to nuke another nacho. No how.
This puts a cramp in my dinner-making style since I tend to microwave a bag o' Steam Fresh vegetables nearly every night, so since then I've had to *gasp* buy fresh vegetables and boil the damn things. That is just far too much effort for me, sadly. So, we need a new microwave.
Eight years ago, when we bought this house, the oven was on the list of "things to replace." Yeah, it's still here. It doesn't go over 400 degrees F. Well, you can set it to whatever you want, but be aware that if you set it even one itty bitty degree over 400, whatever you put in there will immediately be reduced to a charcoal briquette. Trust me. It took my husband several years of burning his frozen pizzas to take my word for it. And now, it's been getting worse; there's just no predicting when it will burn the crap out of your food. So, we need a new oven.
Last straw: I seem to go through digital cameras like they're the disposable cardboard kind. I mean, I try to treat them nicely; I keep them in a little padded camera bag and I don't let the kids play with them. Well, despite my best efforts, my beloved little Canon started acting weird a couple of weeks ago. I mean, I looked like crap in every shot, so it MUST be the camera, right? Heh. Right. Anyway, it really was taking blurry pics and it was pissing me off, so I got even with it by dropping it on my kitchen floor on Saturday while clowning around with Mala in a Merlot-induced photo sesh. So, we need a new camera.
I need to fall in a pile of cash, apparently, or else find a super duper Microwave/Range/Camera combo sale somewhere.
Farging icehole.
EDITED TO ADD:
Two more pieces of shite to add to the list: my double toaster - one side is kaput for no discernable reason. Great. More importantly and MOST ANNOYINGLY, my cell phone keeps turning off with no warning while I'm talking on it! WTF??! I give up!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Our day with Pigpen
So yesterday Mala and I took our two oldest kids to an event which featured all kinds of locally grown & made goods & services. It was fun, but as soon as we got there we both smelled something icky. It smelled, to be perfectly frank, like cow poop. We kind of laughed it off and said that there must be some product in the vacinity that smelled like manure, but the smell kept coming back no matter where we went. We were both sniffing ourselves and our respective children, but couldn't pinpoint the source.
It wasn't until it got so bad that I felt like I was standing next to an open portapotty on a hot summer day that I finally cornered my son and checked his underwear to see what was going ON down there.
It was totally him. Holy SKIDMARKS, Batman!
Ew. He must've been "sharting" all the livelong day. Then, on the way home, it got even worse and we were rolling down the windows to keep our eyes from watering. So we get home, and he takes a shower. Problem solved, right? Not really. I don't know what was going on with that boy because within half an hour he walked into the room and his little stink cloud followed him. Really nice ambiance for the dinner party we were having. (slapping forehead)
*sigh* Kids.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Mom jeans?
I've been on a new jeans kick lately. What can I say, the stores are moving denim out to make room for Spring stuff, and I've been finding some good sales. So, I've bought about 3 pairs over the last few weeks, and one pair is... well, questionable.
Don't get me wrong - I love them. I'm actually wearing them right now. But, they're kind of trouser-style, a little bit 70's, a little bit country, a little bit rock n' roll. Not really, but they are wide legged with those fake girly pockets in front. They meet my requirements: they make my ass look decent and don't cause muffin-top, they're dark wash and comfortable. BUT. I'm a little concerned that they're mom jeans.
You know the kind. High waisted. Small pockets. Tapered legs. :::shudder:::
"Give her something that says, 'I'm not a woman anymore. I'm a mom!'"
A friend of mine recently confided in me that she thinks ALL jeans look like mom jeans on us, simply because we're in our 30's and are, in fact, moms. I heartily disagree. I mean, really. I have LOVED my thirties so far; my twenties were great, and I can truly say I've enjoyed every decade of my life thus far, but so far the 30's are rockin' the hizzouse. I love my kids, my husband is still wicked fun to be with, and I've made some great friends. I'm still young(ish) and hip(ish), damn it!
So, you be the judge. Are these mom jeans?
Give it to me straight. I can take it! (I think. Sort of. Maybe. Ugh.)
Don't get me wrong - I love them. I'm actually wearing them right now. But, they're kind of trouser-style, a little bit 70's, a little bit country, a little bit rock n' roll. Not really, but they are wide legged with those fake girly pockets in front. They meet my requirements: they make my ass look decent and don't cause muffin-top, they're dark wash and comfortable. BUT. I'm a little concerned that they're mom jeans.
You know the kind. High waisted. Small pockets. Tapered legs. :::shudder:::
"Give her something that says, 'I'm not a woman anymore. I'm a mom!'"
A friend of mine recently confided in me that she thinks ALL jeans look like mom jeans on us, simply because we're in our 30's and are, in fact, moms. I heartily disagree. I mean, really. I have LOVED my thirties so far; my twenties were great, and I can truly say I've enjoyed every decade of my life thus far, but so far the 30's are rockin' the hizzouse. I love my kids, my husband is still wicked fun to be with, and I've made some great friends. I'm still young(ish) and hip(ish), damn it!
So, you be the judge. Are these mom jeans?
Give it to me straight. I can take it! (I think. Sort of. Maybe. Ugh.)
Thursday, March 26, 2009
"Do-over" Wednesday. AKA: Girl Crushes
Yesterday was "Do-over Wednesday." I went over to my friend's house and this time, we actually made it to the movie theatre (on time!) and saw Confessions of a Shopaholic before it leaves the cinema. It was cheese-tastic, and I loved it. Well, everything but the end, in which soaring music, wind in the heroine's hair, and every chick flick cliche in the book made their appearance to send it home. Just in case you forgot you were watching a fluff movie involving no real substance.
Anyway, I have a total girl crush on Isla Fisher. She's friggin' adorable. The red hair, the cute-as-a-button face, the quirky attitude. Love her!
Now, I'm a lover of men. Oh yeah, I love the menfolk. BUT, that doesn't mean I can't admire the beauty of a woman without wanting to, ya know, touch her & shit. There are a couple of actresses who fall into the girl crush category:
Isla.
Hey, she's married to Borat, so she's gotta have a sense of humor, right? Also, who could watch her in Wedding Crashers and not laugh their ass off? No one I want to know, surely.
Zooey Deschanel
I think she's hilarious & pretty in a very understated kind of way. Failure to Launch is not a great movie, for instance, but Zooey is terrific in it. Also, Winter Passing - great flick, and shows a more serious (but still funny) side of Will Ferrell. She's also marrying one of the dudes from Death Cab for Cutie, a band I enjoy. Bonus cool points, that.
Anna Faris
LOVE HER. She's pretty and funny, and stars in a ridiculous stoner movie that makes me laugh every time: Smiley Face. Also, Just Friends? She is insanely funny in it.
Ok, I'll stop now before you all start to tag me as a gigantic lesbian. NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT. :) I just like pretty chicks who make me laugh - is that so wrong?
Anyway, I have a total girl crush on Isla Fisher. She's friggin' adorable. The red hair, the cute-as-a-button face, the quirky attitude. Love her!
Now, I'm a lover of men. Oh yeah, I love the menfolk. BUT, that doesn't mean I can't admire the beauty of a woman without wanting to, ya know, touch her & shit. There are a couple of actresses who fall into the girl crush category:
Isla.
Hey, she's married to Borat, so she's gotta have a sense of humor, right? Also, who could watch her in Wedding Crashers and not laugh their ass off? No one I want to know, surely.
Zooey DeschanelI think she's hilarious & pretty in a very understated kind of way. Failure to Launch is not a great movie, for instance, but Zooey is terrific in it. Also, Winter Passing - great flick, and shows a more serious (but still funny) side of Will Ferrell. She's also marrying one of the dudes from Death Cab for Cutie, a band I enjoy. Bonus cool points, that.
Anna FarisLOVE HER. She's pretty and funny, and stars in a ridiculous stoner movie that makes me laugh every time: Smiley Face. Also, Just Friends? She is insanely funny in it.
Ok, I'll stop now before you all start to tag me as a gigantic lesbian. NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT. :) I just like pretty chicks who make me laugh - is that so wrong?
The Secret Scripture
We've just chosen our May Bookgroup book and it sounds fascinating...
Nearing her one-hundredth birthday, Roseanne McNulty faces an uncertain future, as the Roscommon Regional Mental hospital where she's spent the best part of her adult life, prepares for closure. Over the weeks leading up to this upheaval, she talks often with her psychiatrist Dr Grene, and their relationship intensifies and complicates. Told through their respective journals, the story that emerges is at once shocking and deeply beautiful. Refracted through the haze of memory and retelling, Roseanne's story becomes an alternative, secret history of Ireland's changing character and the story of a life blighted by terrible mistreatment and ignorance, and yet marked still by love and passion and hope.
Nearing her one-hundredth birthday, Roseanne McNulty faces an uncertain future, as the Roscommon Regional Mental hospital where she's spent the best part of her adult life, prepares for closure. Over the weeks leading up to this upheaval, she talks often with her psychiatrist Dr Grene, and their relationship intensifies and complicates. Told through their respective journals, the story that emerges is at once shocking and deeply beautiful. Refracted through the haze of memory and retelling, Roseanne's story becomes an alternative, secret history of Ireland's changing character and the story of a life blighted by terrible mistreatment and ignorance, and yet marked still by love and passion and hope.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Adidas ayakkabı modelleri
Dünyanınönce gelen spor giyim markalarından biri olan Adidas hiç süpehesizki her sene çıkarıdğı birbirinden güzel ayakkabı modelleri ile sevenlerini mutlu ediyor . Adidas ayakkabı giyinmeyi sevenler çokdur mutlaka rahat ayakkabı kaliteli ve her zaman trend.
Özellike ile süperstar modellerinide bilirsiniz onlarda birer efsanedir ztaen Adidas markası kendi başına bir efsane nereden baksanız 1874 lü yıllara dayanan bir tarihi var adidasın.
Özellike ile süperstar modellerinide bilirsiniz onlarda birer efsanedir ztaen Adidas markası kendi başına bir efsane nereden baksanız 1874 lü yıllara dayanan bir tarihi var adidasın.
New Asher Roth I Love College Video
Asher has very nice style :) . He say I love College maybe many people love college :) .
Are you ready party ? where is the party :) . . . Asher party time on the this video .
I Love College Lyrics by Asher
I'm nice right now, man
I-I feel good
If you have a drink
Would you please put it in the air?
That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it
I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked
Drink my beer and smoke my weed but my good friends is all I need
Pass out at 3, wake up at 10, go out to eat then do it again
Man, I love college
I wanna go to college for the rest of my life
Sip Banker's Club and drink Miller Lite
On Thirsty Thursday and Tuesday Night Ice
And I can get pizza a dollar a slice
So fill up my cup, let's get fucked up
I'm next on the table, who want what?
I am champion at beer pong
Allen Iverson, Hakeem Olajuwon
Don't even bounce, not in my house
Better hope you make it otherwise you naked
Time isn't wasted when you're getting wasted
Woke up today and all I could say is
Um, that party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it
I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked
Drink my beer and smoke my weed but my good friends is all I need
Pass out at 3, wake up at 10, go out to eat then do it again
Man, I love college, ay!
And I love drinking, ay!
I love women, ay!
Man, I love college
I can't tell you what I learned from school but
I could tell you a story or two, um
Yeah, of course I learned some rules
Like don't pass out with your shoes on
(Get the Sharpie!)
And don't leave the house 'til the booze gone
(No, we're not leaving)
And don't have sex if she's too gone
When it comes to condoms put two on
(Trust me)
Then tomorrow night find a new jawn
Hold the beer bong, nothing wrong with some fun
(Here, hold this)
Even if we did get a little bit too drunk
Time isn't wasted when you're getting wasted
Woke up today and all I could say is
That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it
(I wish we taped)
I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked
Drink my beer and smoke my weed but my good friends is all I need
Pass out at 3, wake up at 10, go out to eat then do it again
Man, I love college, ay!
I love drinking, ay!
I love women, ay!
I love college
Now if everybody would please
Put their drink as high as they can
As high as they can
(As high as they can)
And repeat after me
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
Freshmen! Freshmen!
Freshmen! Freshmen!
Do something' crazy! Do somethin' crazy!
Do something' crazy! Do somethin' crazy!
Keg stand! Keg stand!
Keg stand! Keg stand!
(That party last night)
Man, I love college
I love it!
(That party last night)
Alright everybody, I gotta head back to class for a little bit
That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it
(I wish we taped)
(You know it's going down)
I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked
Drink my beer and smoke my weed but my good friends is all I need
(You're all invited, bring your friends)
Pass out at 3, wake up at 10, go out to eat then do it again
Man, I love college
Do I really have to graduate?
Or can I just stay here for the rest of my life?
Hello Beyonce - HELLO Video *Exclusive*
I like this song so ı want to hello world hello my love hello mother and father hello god hello every body . . .
and other video ebout Beyonce's Hello /
Beyonce "Hello" Official Music
Beyonce "Hello" Official Music
Beyonce has very nice voice ı think she is very googe singer and woman . Beyonce Very good performance to show end album " I am Sasha Fierce " .
I listen to the radio "hello , hello hello " . . . so I love this song . . .
Hello Lyrics
"Hello"
Oh!
Oh oh, oh oh oh oh......
I love to see you walk into the room
Body shining lighting up the place
And when you talk, everybody stops
Cause they know you know just what to say
And the way that you protect your friends
Baby, I respect you for that
And when you grow, you take everyone you love along
I love that you don't fly me away
Don't need to buy a diamond key to unlock my heart
You shelter my soul
You're my fire when I'm cold
I want you to know
You had me at hello
Hello
Hello
Hello
You had me at hello
Hello
Hello
Hello
It was many years ago
Baby when you
Stole my cool
Cause you had me at hello
Hello
Hello
Hellooh oh oh oh oh
Monday, March 23, 2009
Did you know?
That if you're on Facebook and you Google yourself, bits of your profile show up on the search?
I have to laugh:
First of all, the random friends that show up are cracking me up. That first guy? The mayor of Manchester. Yep. We're like this. Secondly, every time you ever say you're a "fan" of something, it shows up. Therefore, let the Googling community know that I am Bev and I LIKE BACON. And vino, peace, and NPR. Yes, I'm a peaceful, wine-drinking, bacon-eating, radio-listening gal.
Not that it isn't true, but.... Whatever. Just thought it was kind of funny.
Incidentally, you only get this if you Google my maiden name. If you google my married name, the search is taken over by a romance novelist of the same name. Her books look quite raunchy! I think I need to pick one up ASAP. ;) Also, whenever I get around to finishing my own little masterpiece (which is collecting dust on my laptop right now), I'll need to publish using my maiden name, apparently. Because, you know, the publishers will be beating down my door.
The pilatus pc-12 and models
hey
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Pilatus PC12 (HB-FOT) of the Swiss Air Force landing at the Royal International Air Tattoo, Fairford, Gloucestershire, England.
Photographed by Adrian Pingstone on July 17th 2006 and released to the public domain.
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| Pilatus PC-12 800 x 600 - 137k - jpg [ ] | The new Pilatus PC-12/47 pics 800 x 600 - 72k - jpg | Pilatus PC-12 Single-Turboprop ... 500 x 306 - 44k - jpg | Pilatus PC12 aircraft used for ... |
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| Pilatus PC-12 | Pilatus PC-12/45 aircraft picture | Pilatus PC12 (HB-FOT) of the Swiss ... | Flight1’s Pilatus PC-12 On CD |
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| Pilatus PC-12 800 x 600 - 133k - jpg www.azhangar.com | Copyright . Heliponents. 800 x 531 - 21k - jpg www.heliponentsinc.com | ... state-of-the-art Pilatus PC-12, ... 432 x 279 - 20k - jpg www.cbairport.org | Pilatus PC-12 - Corporate Flight ... 450 x 333 - 66k - jpg www.subhaaviation.co.in |
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| Air Engiadina Pilatus PC-12 HB-FOI - ... 1024 x 702 - 449k - jpg | Pilatus PC-12 500 x 500 - 49k - jpg www.compass21aviation.com | N781PE 2006 Pilatus PC-12 1500 x 1000 - 406k - jpg |
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